Thursday Interview: Ozzy the Mozzie


– Do you know you’re possibly the most detested creature on earth? How does that feel?

– Couldn’t care less, frankly. Why? You think it should bother me?

– You kill almost a million people a year through malaria. You cause agonizing pain through dengue fever and chikungunya. Not to mention all the nasty itches. I mean, there’s absolutely nothing nice about you. And you don’t care?

– Look, I’m a mozzie, you’re a person, right? We don’t have the same agenda. Or rather we do – survival. Same game, we play it differently, that’s all.

– I beg to differ. For you it may be survival, but we have other aspirations. Love. Curiosity. Self-fulfilment. All the things which give life a meaning and which you don’t even understand.

– Well, if I were you, I’d think a bit more about survival. Because the way things are going, we’ll still be around when you’re long gone, destroyed by your own stupidity. You’re so arrogant, it makes my blood boil. Or rather yours, since I’ve just bitten you.

-Hah! Think that’s funny, do you? Well, look what I’ve got here. One press of this and psscht! You’re a goner.

– So you can kill me but I’m not allowed to kill you. Maybe just a hint of double standards?

– Not at all. We’re a higher form of life, as I’ve said.

– Oh, yes, very la-di-da, with your Mozart and your Walt Whitman and your Einstein. How about Wayne Rooney? For a higher form of life, leaves a bit to be desired, I’d say.

– Well, at least he scores goals. More than can be said for you.

– This conversation’s getting silly. I fly, I bite, I transmit disease. And I might add that when it comes to malaria, you transmit it even more than I do. Besides, if you were so clever, you’d have eradicated me by now, or developed a better immune system. Instead of which, I’ve developed resistance to your drugs. You’re never going to win this war, you know. And it is a war because there’s no way we’ll reach a compromise. (Pssht!). We’re going to be enemies … until  either you… die or … else … uh …

– So much for you, Ozzy. Don’t say I didn’t warn you. Now at least I can get back to work without you interrup –

– Bzzz! Hey, you just killed Ozzy. You know what? I happen to be his cousin. He told me you taste pretty good, so I’ve been tucking in. Already got a bellyfull – delicious! Name’s Mitch the Itch, by the way.

12 thoughts on “Thursday Interview: Ozzy the Mozzie

  1. Excellent because thought-provoking! However, Ozzy is wrong on one count and that is: “… if you were so clever, you’d have eradicated me by now, or developed a better immune system.” Actually, humans are too clever for their own comfort, and it’s widely believed rather suspected that the big fat ones in the pharmaceutical industry would do anything to prevent vaccines or cures from being developed just to keep their own cash registers ringing as is said to be the case with any other epidemic like AIDS, Cancer, Ebola to name a few! 😦

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yes, I don’t doubt there’s some truth in that. Certainly, diseases like malaria or ebola, restricted to the less affluent countries, attract little interest or funding from the pharmaceutical companies (which makes the work of the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation all the more remarkable and vital). Until, as with ebola, the developed countries start freaking – then the funds miraculously open up.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Have a great trip, TJ – Cambodia and Vietnam, I believe? Unless you’re with someone who attracts the mozzies more than you (my wife is excellent for that), tip a bucket of citronella over yourself, cover up and you’ll be fine.
      Many thanks for your great A’s to my Q’s – it’s scheduled for Monday.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post. My young nephew caught malaria three years ago while on a missionary trip in West Africa. He was only 20 years old then. He and his friend slept in a room and opened up the window at night. Mosquitoes got into their sleeping quarters and he was soon hospitalized.

    Liked by 1 person

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